i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
