he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize