Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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