Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize