this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Randomize