if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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