shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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