She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
