Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I think pants incapable of making pants work
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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