I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize