Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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