When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
