Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Randomize
