She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
