I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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