Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize