she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
