so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
