haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
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