So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
