thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
