Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Randomize
