I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize