good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
