Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
