we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
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I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
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Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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