After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
