idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
