I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
We left an ass print on the piano.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
