Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
