You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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