its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
