when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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