Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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