this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
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