I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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