Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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