i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
