my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
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