just survived the first fart of the relationship.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
