Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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