STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
