There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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