i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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