he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
only you would photoshop your dick
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
