i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize