I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
