i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
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He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
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I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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