That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Randomize
