and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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