I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize